When a mother's love burns too brightly | Irish Examiner
A Mother Wound may be thought of as injury to the psyche of a child in the relationship is to be used by the mother to meet her own narcissistic needs. . Men being driven by the emotional and psychological energy of. Some types of unhealthy mother-son relationships can be so toxic that In the following article, we will look at some examples of unhealthy they do it to the extreme and the psychological health of both parties is put at risk. Can you clarify your question a bit more? Are your speaking in terms of typical relationship as in parent/child relationship? Or in terms of the atypical romantic.
A strong relationship with mum is crucial to the emotional health of every son and daughter, influencing all future relationships. Keith Gaynor sees the relationship as central.
Adult Sons of Controlling Mothers: Toxic Relationship Effects - Exploring your mind
Up to age 15 or 20 the mother-son connection remains the primary relationship with a female outside of those with teachers, sisters or friends. For the man this becomes the initial template of what a woman is, says Gaynor.
The attached style we have very early in life will be the attachment style in adulthood. Anything she wanted she just had to call and he would go running after her.
Men and the Mother Wound | HuffPost
She always took priority over kids and me. Michael Gurian Reviewed by: As the author writes: As much as this is a journey-book about mothers and sons, it is equally about sons and lovers. A Guided Journey of Initiation. The second part of the book is designed as a workbook, providing readers with exercises in meditation, journaling, and assignments to challenge and evolve relationships with mothers and to prescribe mindful doses of self-reflection and development.
Gurian is specific in addressing the target audience for this text, suggesting that the book is written more for sons than for daughters and that, while the book can be read in solitude, it may be more suitable to use with the company of other men, a support group, or a therapist.
The book also suggests that gay men will gain as much benefit as straight men and encourages gay men to reconstruct the detailing of intimate opposite-sex relationships as intimate same-sex relationships.
Compared to many books exploring the mother-son relationship and its lifelong impact, The Invisible Presence is careful not to blame mothers for problems men have in their masculine identities and intimate relationship developments.
My Mother Wound is equally deep in its own way as my Father Wound, but much of it is hidden in the weeds and shadow realms of my psyche. Finding its various elements and aspects, seeing them, and recognizing them for what they are is a tricky job. The core truths haven't been nearly as easy to access, and the internal and social prohibitions against doing so make it feel incredibly risky to even try.
Elements of the culture have amplified, and continue to amplify, the conditioning I received as a child that women especially mothers are inherently virtuous, self-sacrificing, and morally infallible, making a tough slog through the dark feminine underworld in my own psyche even tougher. But this is work I have to do, even if I feel I am doing it imperfectly, if I have any chance of being whole, mature, and complete as a man. Why is Mother Wound work important?
The Psychology of the Mother-Son Relationship
Mother Wounds that lurk unacknowledged and unhealed in men don't just hurt men. They also hurt women and children across the culture. It often seems that we are inundated with an apparently infinite stream of stories about misogyny, abuse, and violence inflicted on women by men, accompanied by similarly unending commentary as to the causes.
But the one factor I almost never see included in these discussions is this: Many of these men are being driven, at least in part, by the powerful, unconscious emotional energy of an unresolved Mother Wound.
Adult Sons of Controlling Mothers: Toxic Relationship Effects
Until we're ready as a culture to explore and address the causes and implications of that, I don't think we're going to get too far in addressing the more dramatically problematic and damaging behaviors some men exhibit with women. That's the extreme end of the scale and is not representative of the behavior of the majority of men, but as explored earlier in this piece, there are many other negative if less visible and less dramatic dynamics in men's lives that develop as a consequence of unresolved Mother Wounds.
The resultant effects hurt women and children as well as the men themselves, although the impacts to all may be less obvious, more subtle, and play out over longer periods of time. We simply cannot have an emotionally and psychologically healthy society without emotionally and psychologically healthy men.
Men being driven by the emotional and psychological energy of unconscious, unresolved Mother Wounds will continue to suffer, and their suffering will continue to ripple out into their relationships and the culture at large, until their needs are recognized, honored, and addressed in a meaningful and effective fashion.
Doing the work For the reasons articulated earlier in this piece, it's taken me many years to begin to move into my own Mother Wound work fully, and I still find it very challenging.