Stop Looking For The Perfect Relationship & Start Learning How To Love - mindbodygreen
Finding the perfect partner versus finding the perfect in your partner. The things that drive the engine of the relationship. If they do, then they. This idea of a perfect relationship that we all have made up in our head is the reason behind so many unhappy and unsatisfying relationships. happy couple, finding real love, real love not perfect love another's minds, the quirks, the interactions that make the relationship truly special.
Curious people tend to grow smarter over time, while those who are bright may languish intellectually if they lack curiosity. Sensual rather than sexy.
Caring rather than beautiful or handsome. A little mysterious rather than glamorous.
Humorous rather than wealthy. From a family with similar values to yours, rather than someone from a specific ethnic or social background.
Needs are different than wants in that needs are those qualities that matter to you most, such as values, ambitions, or goals in life. These are probably not the things you can find out about a person by eyeing them on the street, reading their profile on a dating site, or sharing a quick cocktail at a bar before last call.
Stop Looking For The Perfect Partner And Try This Instead | HuffPost
What feels right to you? When looking for lasting love, forget what looks right, forget what you think should be right, and forget what your friends, parents, or other people think is right, and ask yourself: Does the relationship feel right to me? Concentrate on activities you enjoy, your career, health, and relationships with family and friends. When you focus on keeping yourself happy, it will keep your life balanced and make you a more interesting person when you do meet someone special.
It always takes time to really get to know a person and you have to experience being with someone in a variety of situations. Be honest about your own flaws and shortcomings.
Besides, what you consider a flaw may actually be something another person finds quirky and appealing. Build a genuine connection The dating game can be nerve wracking. But no matter how shy or socially awkward you feel, you can overcome your nerves and self-consciousness and forge a great connection. Focus outward, not inward.
Staying fully present in the moment will help take your mind off worries and insecurities. No one likes to be manipulated or placated. In ideal relationships, we give space to ourselves as well as our partner. Giving space to ourselves means not steadfastly holding onto our perspectives and feelings as absolute truth.
We don't live in denial of those feelings and we don't suppress them, but we do hold them while understanding the nature of life. This includes knowing there is transference between ourselves and others.
An Open Letter To Those Seeking A Perfect Relationship | Open Letter
We give space to our partners in a similar manner. We understand that they, too, are dealing with transference issues and the pressures of life. The concept here is to have a 'healthy relationship with' the nature of relationships; this means to neither adhere to an idealized notion nor allow ourselves to be overshadowed by our own personal issues. Conflicts, traumas, hurts, personal issues, and stresses naturally arise in a relationship.
They can even persist for years. We weather a wide range of challenges in life.
But, as time passes, the consequences of what we endure involve not so much what actually happened, but how those things are remembered. Our lives together are like a great journey, traversing thousands of miles on foot. We encounter vast deserts, jungles, and formidable mountain passes in all kinds of weather: Although I know I am not always the perfect boyfriend and my girlfriend isn't the perfect girlfriend either, I feel we have several habits that people outside the relationship might see as damaging when they are actually healthy.
If other couples introduced some of these into their relationships then perhaps they would be the better for it! Honesty is the best policy I don't like to lie to my girlfriend and I appreciate that she will tell me everything too. If she tells me how many guys asked her out when she was walking down the street, it doesn't make me jealous but rather proud of both myself and her. It makes me appreciate her more, reminds me of how lucky I am to have her and see her as those people do on the street.
Of course honesty being the best policy doesn't always result in happiness. Like any woman my girlfriend takes pride in her appearance, she is a beautiful, tall woman and loves to dress well and look good before going out. Obviously I should know after three years that it takes her multiple outfits and several piles of clothes on the floor to get an outfit together, but the mess irritates me.
Generally she will get ready and look great, but there are the odd occasions when what she has thrown together doesn't work at all. So when it comes to her asking "how do I look? I however prefer to be honest and say what I feel doesn't go, it usually results in her getting pissy at me and taking an extra long amount of time to get ready but we both feel more comfortable for it when we go out.